â™« â€œMedley: Emiliaâ€™s / Always In The Way / Helenaâ€ by The Stanislawski Polka Band (with Walt Solek)
The laughter-only verses in â€œEmiliaâ€™sâ€ (0:32 & 1:18) always get me, especially when the second one goes off the rails. â€œAlways In The Wayâ€ (1:51) has a surprising topic for a polka. And â€œHelenaâ€ is â€œcute and gayâ€.
Why did the banker bring chicken soup to COVID-19 patients?
He wanted to fill the coughers.
(This is a reverse knock-knock joke.)
Go away! Now I have to disinfect my door. :(
How many rolls of toilet paper does it take to survive a pandemic?
ALL OF THEM
How many pandemic-deniers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Fifty-one, in violation of the ban on large gatherings.
Whatâ€™s the difference between COVID-19 and a baseball?
Catching a baseball is fun.
Why did the coronavirus cross the road?
To infect the other side.
â™« â€œFrosty The Snowmanâ€ by Santa Sabbath (to the tune of â€œParanoidâ€ by Black Sabbath)
Thereâ€™s a music video with lyrics.
(I think I heard of Santa Sabbath via Tim Hulsizer.)
â™« â€œPoolside Polkaâ€ by Rotondi
â€œLove is in your eyes, and the streets are / awash with new chlorineâ€
I drew a Before Sleep strip of the chorus:
â™« “Dead Puppies” by Ogden Edsl
A dreadful ditty for the spookiest month.